Happily Ever After?

by - Desember 13, 2013

Remember I once wrote here about how I like to analyze others relationship? Well this post might be another perception from my analysis.

Most girls, even women, believe in fairy tales and this too-good-to-be-true-happily-ever-after ending. Do I? Unfortunately, I probably don't.
The reason is not because I didn't watch princess movies like Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty or Beauty and The Beast during my childhood. Believe me, I'm a big fan of Disney. I can assure you that I did watch those movies. 
It's just that, I'm kinda losing my faith in happily ever after concept. And here I'll tell you why.

1. Hard, hard, work.
I think building a happy relationship is about hardwork and not just kissing a princess then get married. But I used to believe that there is something called "chemistry" that some couples may have. Still, they have to work on their relationship too, but maybe, just maybe - the hardwork part will be easier when you get chemistry. 

Turns out, lately, I found that chemistry does not guarantee you to live happily ever after with your partner. Some people who have chemistry may just end up as friends in the end, and it's not because they don't work on their relationship, maybe it is because the chemistry is not.. meant to be?

2. The right one? 
Being in the beginning of 20s, one of my life issue is to find "the right one" whom I will marry someday. But then again, I look at some older people who already build their family, had kids, and 'settle down'. Do they really married "the right one"? Or they just get married and then their wife/husband practically becomes "the right one"?

Some people are just stay with each other because, well, they have too. It's for the kids. It's for the parents who expecting them to do so. It's for any possible reason they could think of. Yet I wonder if they ever consider loving each other as the reason.

Some people even wondering about someone who once they loved but they didn't end up with. If so, is it the one their marrying is not "the right one"? For me, it's just so wrong to have this lifetime wondering. People have to learn to let go off the past, no? I know it's not easy, yet I just couldn't imagine having such life - imagining who they expect as "the right one" while living with someone else.

3. Ex-soulmate
I once deeply in love with someone that I thought was my soulmate. Someone you think you can't live without. When you break apart, it's like having half of your soul ripped out. When you think your partner is your soulmate, there are two things you should consider:
1. Is he/she thinks the same about you?
2. Will you both becomes soulmate forever?

Because maybe, just maybe, someday you'll find out that this-person-you-think-you-know-everything-about is so much different than before. And then after years building your relationship, suddenly you feel like that bond is gone. That "soulmate bond" is not exist anymore. In another case, you both may break up for some reasons. You had your new life, so does he/she, but deeply inside you know, that soulmate bond never broke. Yet you both could not be with each other. What will you do then?

Despite all the not-happy-ending-stuff I wrote, I actually know some relationship that last. I happen to know some people who really have chemistry, being the right one for each other, get married, and becomes soulmate even after one passed away earlier than another. It's not a fairytale, no, but they were happy. And though I questioned the fairytale life story and its too-good-to-be-true-ending,  I do believe, people can make their own "fairytale" and they can define their own happy ending. It's never too late.

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